Moo Networks Privacy Policy

"Privacy is overrated" -- That is our motto at Moo Networks.

The internet is not as anonymous as it used to be. When you visit our website, we reserve the right to log any and all of the following information. Your hostname (and possibly city/state/country), your MAC address (if available), the website that referred you to us (so we can send them a box of cookies), the search engine that refered you to us, what you may have been searching for [that led you to us], the date and time that you visited us, your operating system version, the version of your browser, your screen resolution, and any other information we deem worthy of magnetically etching onto the platters of our server's hard drives.

Once we have your information in our desired electronic format, we will compress it. Later your data may be de-compressed, indexed, inflated and deflated, debugged, de-crypted (as necessary), de-combobulated, de-sensitized, de-scrambled (on ocasion), de-classified, and (at our disgression) de-atomized.

Once your data has been sorted, catalogued, indexed, queried, optimized, and baked at 350 degrees for 45 minutes, we will take any stimulating tid-bits that strike our fancy and, with the permission of ours and perhaps foreign governments, sell your information to the absolute lowest bidder (traditionally the Russians) so that they may use it in fashion they see fit.

Data that you provide to us (either knowingly or not), that we do not use, bake, compress, and/or sell to the Russians will be disposed of in the most inappropriate way possible (i.e.: fed to elephant seals, printed on cheap paper and used in the corporate washroom, distributed to homeless children in Africa, or any other way we see fit.)

By visiting our website, or by reading this page, you agree to release all claim, copyright, trademark, and similar holdings to this personal data and furthermore agree that said data will become the sole property of Moo Networks and/or the Russians and/or the starving children in Africa (depending on what we do with your data.)

If you do NOT agree, well, it's kind of too late because we've already collected your data and it is probably being indexed right now.. or maybe inflated.. or it could be on that plane to Africa... You never know...